Back again with the “nice guy” crap. Little of the transactional behavior and attitudes that you ascribe to faux nice guys isn’t equally present among the “bad boys” who often seem to do so well in the dating scene. More likely the guys adopting a faux “nice guy” strategy are just lower rated in the dating lists that so many people hew to, less attractive, shorter, less handsome, less financially well off, possessing less status. Those better off don’t need to adopt a “nice” facade to attract dates, relationships, and of course there are any number of legitimately nice guys (and gals) who aren’t helped by superficial hit jobs like this article.

I suspect that women have learned to read “niceness” among men as a “tell” of lower transactional currency; men with the “goods” will be pursued, will know that that they are hot properties, will have an easily read confidence that is the result of much attention from women and resulting success. I also suspect that much of the “bad boy” image that these men have accrued comes from their acting on the knowledge that there will always be another woman coming along, that they have little need to commit, or to display respect, sensitivity, emotional competence to get what they want.

Of course there are any number of people, male and female, who land somewhere in the mushy middle of attractiveness, are perfectly happy to date people of roughly equal desirability, and for whom “nice” personal attributes like helpfulness, sensitivity, empathy, competent communication and relationship skills are going to be far more important to the success of their relationships than all the transactional lists and measures. Hopefully they won’t make the mistake of taking your nice generalizations seriously.