I think you are only shaming people when you actually shame them. I have to watch this tendency in myself, I shame myself about many issues. Working on this in therapy, figuring out why I’m so hard on myself, a tendency that can bleed over onto others. When somebody offers me another portion of food or something I am avoiding (highly sugared, processed, w bad fats) I tend to slap my belly and make a comment about my weight, which is neither honest or kind. My weight is right in the sweet spot for BMI for my age, and this can be painfully personal for somebody who self shames (like me) or feels judgement from outside. A simple “no thanks” is probably all I ever need in this situation.