I've noticed as I got older that when my friend's parents died they often seemed to take on or channel some the traits they didn't like in those parents. Your personal style sounds great, sounds like it fits you and is authentic, which can be hard for a parent when it doesn't match theirs. I've also noticed that parents often reprise the things their parents did and said, without much awareness of doing so. They usually do their best, they often fall short of the mark, it helps to forgive them though, trust me, this can be hard. Thanks for sharing this personal story.