This is a "huge" problem. With growing (grown?) kids you are fully an adult, and it's time to move past outside verification of your self worth. People who give you more affection and support when your weight drops are probably not worth the effort, they are only interacting with the superficial you.

Aging has its costs and effects, the worst of which is compromised health. If you are fortunate and actually continue to age, your health is going to matter so much more to you than outside compliments, and you are building, or eroding that health with your habits now.

Time to focus on the habits and practices that serve YOU, not the superficial opinions of others;)